scare a date off with 1 phrase!

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Yahweh_is_gracious

Guest
You took 15 minutes to get here. Google maps says the trip takes 12 minutes.

WHO IS HE?!?!?!?!?!
 

MichaelOwen

Senior Member
Nov 6, 2017
909
252
63
*While your pretending to be on the phone* Yeah momma, I went to the doctor and he said my contagious hair lice is curable
 
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Pipp

Majestic Llamacorn
Sep 17, 2013
5,542
2,721
113
Georgia
Well... you don't look as good as I was hoping , but guess you're better than nothing.
 

Pipp

Majestic Llamacorn
Sep 17, 2013
5,542
2,721
113
Georgia
I hope you don't mind a little body odor, I don't believe in using deodorant, shampoo or toothpaste... I like to live like God made me.
 

Pipp

Majestic Llamacorn
Sep 17, 2013
5,542
2,721
113
Georgia
Look I still have one tooth on top... I nicknamed it old yeller.
 
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Yahweh_is_gracious

Guest
All I know is one of us is right, and one of us is you.
 
Y

Yahweh_is_gracious

Guest
New relationships make my stomach hurt. Not from butterflies or anything like that, but from holding in farts.
 
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Yahweh_is_gracious

Guest
This date is going awesome. Could you bring up some petty crap from a week ago to talk about so we can ruin it?
 

Pipp

Majestic Llamacorn
Sep 17, 2013
5,542
2,721
113
Georgia
Look... if anyone ask ... tell them you're my brother... I don't want anyone to know we're dating.. it's nothing personal though.
 
C

claysmithr

Guest
Wow, you're around my daughters age! :)

Note: I actually don't have a daughter.
 

Lighthearted

Senior Member
Oct 17, 2016
1,779
818
113
54
Hey good looking. My name is Jon and I'll be the first man in your life to reject your affections, your physical advances, and I'll put you in the friend zone far quicker than you can imagine doing the same to me. So, shall we order supper?
I wonder if there's anyone here willing to take that as a challenge. Hmmm....
 

BillG

Senior Member
Feb 15, 2017
9,025
4,444
113
I am actually 5,000 years old and a former pharoah of egypt...What's so funny???
You are, you look like your 10,000 years old.
Nothing wrong with being old, I still love you.
Any chance you can put your eyeballs and teeth back in?
And put a suit over your bones.
Its embarrassing.

Cleopatra loves you my pooky wooky.
 
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Yahweh_is_gracious

Guest
I wonder if there's anyone here willing to take that as a challenge. Hmmm....
If she's picking up the check, it's cool. If she expects me to pay, she can hit the road and kick rocks.

The other thing is - I have such terrible taste in women that any woman who shows interest in me is probably a psycho and should be avoided like some sort of plague. It's one of my sick coping mechanisms for be a 4everalone.
 
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joefizz

Guest
You sure you aren't my cat? (The man has lots of body hair)
You sure you aren't a scare crow?(woman has so much make up that she looks unhuman!)