Love Advice with Dr. Des

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Nov 15, 2020
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Newcastle, NSW, Australia
Dear Dr Des,

This is a true story. I know a couple who just met exactly a month ago and have decided to get engaged. Am I the only one who thinks this is crazy? Apparently they feel that it was divinely orchestrated. The way they met, the astounding number of things they have in common, the number of boxes each tick, the comfortableness they feel with each other, the way they fit into each others family etc etc. Is this a recipe for disaster or could it work? It is his second marriage and her first.
it may just work.
 
Aug 2, 2009
24,579
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Dear Dr Des,

This is a true story. I know a couple who just met exactly a month ago and have decided to get engaged. Am I the only one who thinks this is crazy? Apparently they feel that it was divinely orchestrated. The way they met, the astounding number of things they have in common, the number of boxes each tick, the comfortableness they feel with each other, the way they fit into each others family etc etc. Is this a recipe for disaster or could it work? It is his second marriage and her first.
Sounds like recipe for disaster to me. I would explain, but it would take too long... but I could be wrong too.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
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I am from USA. Sounds a little bit like Baseball. You know a lot more about Cricket than I know about Baseball:). Sounds like it would be fascinating to watch! Have you ever played Cricket?
Quote from Raphael:

"Cricket? NOBODY understands cricket! You gotta know what a crumpet is before you can understand cricket."
 

Ruby123

Well-known member
Mar 1, 2019
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Sounds like recipe for disaster to me. I would explain, but it would take too long... but I could be wrong too.
I agree, Both parties are usually on their best behavior so early on in the piece so they really don't know the "real person" just yet. Perhaps they will get a shock. I have heard so many people say that their partner has changed and they weren't like that in the beginning. Well they have changed because what they were in the beginning was not the real them. Now they feel comfortable enough to be the real them or they feel the other is too emotionally invested to just walk away from them.
 
Aug 2, 2009
24,579
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I agree, Both parties are usually on their best behavior so early on in the piece so they really don't know the "real person" just yet. Perhaps they will get a shock. I have heard so many people say that their partner has changed and they weren't like that in the beginning. Well they have changed because what they were in the beginning was not the real them. Now they feel comfortable enough to be the real them or they feel the other is too emotionally invested to just walk away from them.
Yea one month is too soon to know what a person's really like.
 

Desdichado

Senior Member
Feb 9, 2014
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Oh man this is a serious question. Well, assuming they have gone through the traditional steps of answering the troll's riddles before crossing the bridge, summoning the invisible swordsman, and wiring the dowery to my bank account in Monaco...

Honestly, I've heard of these things working out more often than the traditional months of courtship. Speaking anecdotally.

I'd just be happy for them, I guess. Somewhat jealous too.

But there is a lot not being said here. I've never seen them together. Maybe they give off weird, forced vibes.

Dear Dr Des,

This is a true story. I know a couple who just met exactly a month ago and have decided to get engaged. Am I the only one who thinks this is crazy? Apparently they feel that it was divinely orchestrated. The way they met, the astounding number of things they have in common, the number of boxes each tick, the comfortableness they feel with each other, the way they fit into each others family etc etc. Is this a recipe for disaster or could it work? It is his second marriage and her first.
 

Desdichado

Senior Member
Feb 9, 2014
8,768
837
113
Sounds like recipe for disaster to me. I would explain, but it would take too long... but I could be wrong too.
I won't totally disagree here. I dated a girl for four years who became an atheist two years in. She totally changed.

But yeah, we these things you always have to hedge. Most Christians stay Christians. Sometimes a month is enough. Sometimes it isn't. Relationships are great things and great things are never exact.
 

Desdichado

Senior Member
Feb 9, 2014
8,768
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But seriously, answer the troll's riddles before crossing the bridge. If you attempt to cross the bridge, he'll either club you to death or get the troll shaman to curse you.
 

Desdichado

Senior Member
Feb 9, 2014
8,768
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Missed this one.


Step 1: Buy yourself a strong fishing rod. One that can take a swordfish.

Step 2: Hook the book Masculine Christianity by Zachary Garris on the other end.

Step 3: Travel to the closest Christian college campus and perch yourself on a high wall.

Step 4: If she grabs it, reel her in.


Now you do have some wiggle room here. If you don't have a local Christian college, a megachurch letting out should do. Just make sure you have enough pocket change for a trip to Golden Corral.

Masculine Christianity is probably the best option, but there are others out there. Classical philosophy from Aristotle to Seneca will net you a wise lady. How Should We Then Live by Francis Schaeffer has also had some good results.

Just avoid Joel Osteen, romance novels, self-help tripe, and White Fragility.



How does one find a lovely lady who loves God? A real proverbs 31 woman.
 
Aug 2, 2009
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But seriously, answer the troll's riddles before crossing the bridge. If you attempt to cross the bridge, he'll either club you to death or get the troll shaman to curse you.
What are these questions/riddles, oh great Doctor? :)
 

Desdichado

Senior Member
Feb 9, 2014
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Oh depends. Trolls are like people. Their IQ is on a curve. Stupid trolls (usually Stone Trolls) will go with classics like "What's black, white and red all over?"

More intelligent trolls (usually Water Trolls) tend to craft personalized riddles that only the couple can solve. This is what makes it an important rite of passage.


What are these questions/riddles, oh great Doctor? :)
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
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My first question comes from "Lonely in Long Island"

He wants to know how he can find this girl. It can be done in five easy steps:



Step 1: Locate the seeing stone.

Step 2: Kill the evil wizard guarding the seeing stone.

Step 3: Ask the seeing stone for the location of the girl.

Step 4: Confirm location.

Step 5: Thow a cloth over the seeing stone before the Dark Lord sees what you're up to.
Missed this one.


Step 1: Buy yourself a strong fishing rod. One that can take a swordfish.

Step 2: Hook the book Masculine Christianity by Zachary Garris on the other end.

Step 3: Travel to the closest Christian college campus and perch yourself on a high wall.

Step 4: If she grabs it, reel her in.


Now you do have some wiggle room here. If you don't have a local Christian college, a megachurch letting out should do. Just make sure you have enough pocket change for a trip to Golden Corral.

Masculine Christianity is probably the best option, but there are others out there. Classical philosophy from Aristotle to Seneca will net you a wise lady. How Should We Then Live by Francis Schaeffer has also had some good results.

Just avoid Joel Osteen, romance novels, self-help tripe, and White Fragility.
Dang nab it, Desdi!!!

I just posted my thread without seeing these extra steps!!!

https://christianchat.com/christian...r-true-love-via-desdis-5-simple-steps.196886/

Well, if nothing else, this may or may not set it up for a sequel. :censored::cautious::p
 
Aug 2, 2009
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Oh depends. Trolls are like people. Their IQ is on a curve. Stupid trolls (usually Stone Trolls) will go with classics like "What's black, white and red all over?"

More intelligent trolls (usually Water Trolls) tend to craft personalized riddles that only the couple can solve. This is what makes it an important rite of passage.
Oh I thought you meant actual questions like do you mind if I snore a lot lol.

 

Desdichado

Senior Member
Feb 9, 2014
8,768
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Desdichado

Senior Member
Feb 9, 2014
8,768
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I prefer to keep all my business here. Otherwise, people will miss gems like that one.
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
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Spin-off threads?!

I'm not ready for this kind of fame, Seoul!
I figure everybody else is doing it, why not here as well??!!!

Besides.

Just wait about 5 months, and someone is bound to do a reboot/remake anyways.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
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5 months? I thought it was 11... They must be accelerating faster than I thought.