~Chuckle for the Day~

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Jase

Well-known member
Jun 9, 2021
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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back to you after thrown?

Wait for it.........

A stick. 😂
 

Icedaisey

Well-known member
Jul 19, 2021
1,398
469
83
Do It Yourself COVID Test
1. Pour a glass of wine and smell it
2. If you can smell it, then taste it
3. If you can both smell it and taste it, you do not have the Covid virus


A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?"

The horse says, "I just realized that I'm a metaphysical concept within a fictional narrative and will cease to exist at the end of this sentence."
 

Icedaisey

Well-known member
Jul 19, 2021
1,398
469
83
A preacher was pulled over by a policeman for running a red light, and was discovered to be highly intixicated.

“What you you have in that thermos there? Wine?” The cop asked, pointing to an open and empty container in the passenger seat.

“No sir!!” The preacher insisted, “I swear to my Lord and Christ that it was nothing but water! Just water!”


The cop picked up the thermos and sniffed it, “smells like alcohol to me.”

A total look of shock covered the preacher’s face, “MY JESUS!!!” He shouted, jumping up and down. “My Jesus!!! HE’S done it AGAIN!!!!”
If I were that cop I'd drive the man home as a reward for hearing the best DUI excuse of my career.:LOL:
 

Jase

Well-known member
Jun 9, 2021
731
432
63
Funny instructions:
Do not drive with sunshield in place.
(On cardboard sunshield that keeps 🌞 off dashboard)

Do not look into laser with remaining eye. ( On laser pointer)

And finally....

Watercraft riders may suffer injury due to the forced injection of water into body cavities either by falling into the water
or while mounting the craft. (In a jet ski manual) 😂
 

Jase

Well-known member
Jun 9, 2021
731
432
63
When asked How many lemons grow on a lemon tree?

Correct answer...All of them! 😂
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
14,080
4,011
113
When asked How many lemons grow on a lemon tree?

Correct answer...All of them! 😂
Funny thing, I was at a landscaping business a while back, and it was selling a fancy grafted tree that had 5 different kinds of citrus fruits growing from its branches -- including oranges, limes, and yes, lemons.
 

Jase

Well-known member
Jun 9, 2021
731
432
63
Funny thing, I was at a landscaping business a while back, and it was selling a fancy grafted tree that had 5 different kinds of citrus fruits growing from its branches -- including oranges, limes, and yes, lemons.
Wow! That really something!
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
14,080
4,011
113
Wow! That really something!
Yeah, I might have even considered purchasing it, except that it was $500. :oops:

That's just a little too fruity for my poor wallet. :LOL:

P.S. Thanks for the funny/lighthearted things you've been posting around the forum.

Goodness knows we all need something to smile about right now! :) Thanks for putting in the time and effort.
 

Jase

Well-known member
Jun 9, 2021
731
432
63
Yeah, I might have even considered purchasing it, except that it was $500. :oops:

That's just a little too fruity for my poor wallet. :LOL:

P.S. Thanks for the funny/lighthearted things you've been posting around the forum.

Goodness knows we all need something to smile about right now! :) Thanks for putting in the time and effort.
Oh! My..that is quite-a-quite-a...

T Y for the recognition!

I enjoy posting and reading the interesting responses.

And, yes, with ALL that's going on in the world..we need a little laughter! 😂
 

Jase

Well-known member
Jun 9, 2021
731
432
63
T Y, All......nice ya'all appreciate!