Verbally abusive husband

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I_am_Canadian

I_am_Canadian

Senior Member
#81
Dec 8, 2014
2,433
821
113
#81
darej said:
I have a 12 years old daughter and I recently (2 years ago) married a guy who was supposedly christian. We went to church together, read the Bible. After our marriage when we moved in together in our new condo, he started to change. He started to be verbally abusive, not just towards me but my daughter as well. He called us names, putting me and my daughter down, to the point when my daughter is "afraid" of him, not because he would ever physically hit her ( which he never did and would never do) but because of the yelling, name calling etc. We are walking on eggshells at home.....not knowing what we come home to. And it is getting worse and worse. Now he swears with God's name, calling me names...it's awful. He stopped coming to the church with us and now I'm at the point when I don't know what to do. I don't care how ignorant, rude, or un-loving he is towards me (which is very depressing) but it's very hurtful and unacceptable how he is towards my daughter. I don't want him to "ruin" her with his controlling and putting down attitude.....I'm so lost what to do. I know this is not a reason to get divorce, but what about my daughter? I can't have this man ruin her! ☹️
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Sounds like you married a wolf in sheeps clothing, a guy pretending to be a christian but isn't really a christian, I can tell you this, when a person is a Christian, they should be improving, in what they say, do and think, and I can tell you this as a guy who was not raised in a Christian home.

How is his relationship with Jesus? if he doesn't have one he definitely is a wolf in sheeps clothing, if his relationship with Jesus is deteriorating, then it's simply the fact he is back sliding to the man he used to be with out Christ.

Talk to your pastor, and your family if they are christians. I don't mean professing Christians I mean genuine Christians, who have repented of their sins and accepted Jesus as their Lord and Savior. Anyone can say they are a Christian, but the proof is in their words, thoughts and deeds.

His words and actions don't line up with how a Godly man is supposed to live and treat his family.
 
Jesusprincess

Jesusprincess

Junior Member
#82
May 5, 2013
22
1
3
#82
darej said:
I have a 12 years old daughter and I recently (2 years ago) married a guy who was supposedly christian. We went to church together, read the Bible. After our marriage when we moved in together in our new condo, he started to change. He started to be verbally abusive, not just towards me but my daughter as well. He called us names, putting me and my daughter down, to the point when my daughter is "afraid" of him, not because he would ever physically hit her ( which he never did and would never do) but because of the yelling, name calling etc. We are walking on eggshells at home.....not knowing what we come home to. And it is getting worse and worse. Now he swears with God's name, calling me names...it's awful. He stopped coming to the church with us and now I'm at the point when I don't know what to do. I don't care how ignorant, rude, or un-loving he is towards me (which is very depressing) but it's very hurtful and unacceptable how he is towards my daughter. I don't want him to "ruin" her with his controlling and putting down attitude.....I'm so lost what to do. I know this is not a reason to get divorce, but what about my daughter? I can't have this man ruin her! ☹️
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Are you scare of him? do you think he will put a hand on you if you tell him to stop? I think you need to talk to him about not treating your daughter like that and that he needs to respect her. If h does not go to church he will only get worst with time and than later he might do something to your daughter or you that you might regret. sometimes we think we know people and we don't, verbal abuse can turn into physical and maybe abused to your daughter later. You can be married and be saying that it is not a reason to get divorce but if he does not respect your daughter is gonnah be hell in your home. just saying.
 
T

TheLearner

Well-known member
#84
Jan 14, 2019
8,183
1,574
113
68
Brighton, MI
#84
darej said:
I have a 12 years old daughter and I recently (2 years ago) married a guy who was supposedly christian. We went to church together, read the Bible. After our marriage when we moved in together in our new condo, he started to change. He started to be verbally abusive, not just towards me but my daughter as well. He called us names, putting me and my daughter down, to the point when my daughter is "afraid" of him, not because he would ever physically hit her ( which he never did and would never do) but because of the yelling, name calling etc. We are walking on eggshells at home.....not knowing what we come home to. And it is getting worse and worse. Now he swears with God's name, calling me names...it's awful. He stopped coming to the church with us and now I'm at the point when I don't know what to do. I don't care how ignorant, rude, or un-loving he is towards me (which is very depressing) but it's very hurtful and unacceptable how he is towards my daughter. I don't want him to "ruin" her with his controlling and putting down attitude.....I'm so lost what to do. I know this is not a reason to get divorce, but what about my daughter? I can't have this man ruin her! ☹️
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Run and go to Women's Shelter for help, if he has hit you get out of there to somewhere safe and call the police on the way.
 
Katwhe2

Katwhe2

Member
#85
Aug 24, 2019
61
38
18
#85
darej said:
I have a 12 years old daughter and I recently (2 years ago) married a guy who was supposedly christian. We went to church together, read the Bible. After our marriage when we moved in together in our new condo, he started to change. He started to be verbally abusive, not just towards me but my daughter as well. He called us names, putting me and my daughter down, to the point when my daughter is "afraid" of him, not because he would ever physically hit her ( which he never did and would never do) but because of the yelling, name calling etc. We are walking on eggshells at home.....not knowing what we come home to. And it is getting worse and worse. Now he swears with God's name, calling me names...it's awful. He stopped coming to the church with us and now I'm at the point when I don't know what to do. I don't care how ignorant, rude, or un-loving he is towards me (which is very depressing) but it's very hurtful and unacceptable how he is towards my daughter. I don't want him to "ruin" her with his controlling and putting down attitude.....I'm so lost what to do. I know this is not a reason to get divorce, but what about my daughter? I can't have this man ruin her! ☹️
Click to expand...
Yours and your daughters saftey is paramount. Remove yourselves, if you're able to, to safety. Also, seek help from your family and Brethren may also help. It sounds like the current situation is abusive and may not allow you to make healthy choices, not while you and your daughter are being treated badly. Everyone deserves to be safe from harm. God be with you and your daughter during this time. I'll be praying for yous.
 
inukubo

inukubo

Active member
#86
Jun 27, 2019
169
166
43
45
#86
I agree. He obviously hid his true character and lied to get you into this marriage. Its based on a fraud and is causing untold damage to you and your daughter. And if he has no qualms about abusing you verbally, why would he refrain from physically abusing you? The foundation of disrespect is already there, no telling what will set him off the edge. Since you are not in this alone and have your daughter to think of, (And protecting her should be your first priority), there is no shame in doing everything you can to get out and save your daughter's future (and yours). Praying for you.
 
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