Questions For Our Married Friends/People Who Have Experience With Marriage Who Hang Out in Singles
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its just writing down thoughts, but if all their thoughts are negative, then I dont think people really care to read them.
handy ignore button again
anyway, married people DO get bored of their spouse at times since, the opposite sex is not always great company. But I do find if they complain about their spouse I dont really want to know about it. They are the ones that CHOSE to be married. They need to take any complaints to their spouse, not me.
Many singles are widowed or divorced, but they may not have chosen this. So they kind of are always thinking of their spouse or ex. Since its not likely if you friends with a widowed or divorced person that you will ever meet with their ex...then its like, you cant really judge them, since you never met them or know them. You can only take that person for who they are without their spouse or ex.
handy ignore button again
anyway, married people DO get bored of their spouse at times since, the opposite sex is not always great company. But I do find if they complain about their spouse I dont really want to know about it. They are the ones that CHOSE to be married. They need to take any complaints to their spouse, not me.
Many singles are widowed or divorced, but they may not have chosen this. So they kind of are always thinking of their spouse or ex. Since its not likely if you friends with a widowed or divorced person that you will ever meet with their ex...then its like, you cant really judge them, since you never met them or know them. You can only take that person for who they are without their spouse or ex.
With widows (this year, I now know three, because im friends eith elderly women and their husbands have now died) I was more friends with the women than their hubbies, but thats just because women need the friendships of other women and to teach them stuff. The husbands were interesting in their own right, but I would not say I was friends with them cos I only knew them as husbands to my friends.
Like I wouldnt just hang out with the husbands alone. Sometimes they would come along to things but it wasnt something they really wanted to do or initiate.
I have a lot of friends who are single and they had been married, some more than once but I never met their exes.
Like I wouldnt just hang out with the husbands alone. Sometimes they would come along to things but it wasnt something they really wanted to do or initiate.
I have a lot of friends who are single and they had been married, some more than once but I never met their exes.
No one made personal attacks. One person (who I had to take off of ignore to see what the fuss was) made a couple slightly disparaging comments. And why is that person on ignore.... because she's even more out of touch with the reality the rest of us inhabit than you are. Criticism, disagreement, and differing opinions are not personal attacks. But I'm going to have to wait until tomorrow to write my thesis proving that, which I'll then post for you to spend the day reading. Yes that was a joke, kind of like John talking about those weird people who don't like coffee and prefer tea. He's completely wrong about who the weird and not quite human people are (have you seen those coffee drinkers before they've had their coffee?) but pushing back and giving people a hare time about coffee or tea preferences (or long or short post preferences) isn't a personal attack.
Anyway, best way to make life in the forum more pleasant. Ignore the unpleasant people (it's easy, there's a button for that) and the ones who's idiocy routinely infuriates you and then learn to let the rest of the idiots out there wallow in their stupidity if they refuse to consider opinions other than their own.
Anyway, best way to make life in the forum more pleasant. Ignore the unpleasant people (it's easy, there's a button for that) and the ones who's idiocy routinely infuriates you and then learn to let the rest of the idiots out there wallow in their stupidity if they refuse to consider opinions other than their own.
its just a personal preference
coffee or tea. Or both
some people write BOTH long and short posts. How is that attacking anyone.
Some people just like to complain, make the thread all about themselves, rather than just have fun or consider the topic , which is something about married people hanging out with singles. Or vice versa.
I dont think it matters, I post in both singles and family forums, and sometimes even in the miscellaneous. I even post in *gasp* Bible Discussion Forum. Because I like reading the Bible. Call me weird
coffee or tea. Or both
some people write BOTH long and short posts. How is that attacking anyone.
Some people just like to complain, make the thread all about themselves, rather than just have fun or consider the topic , which is something about married people hanging out with singles. Or vice versa.
I dont think it matters, I post in both singles and family forums, and sometimes even in the miscellaneous. I even post in *gasp* Bible Discussion Forum. Because I like reading the Bible. Call me weird
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alleging in a forum that i have a short attention span is a personal attack it is not just a matter of difference of opinion
whist you may be strong enough to handle some name calling,. i am not. I am extremely weak and only when Jesus carries me do i manage to get through my day. many days i do not wish to continue. i come to CC to try and be involved. i try my best to remain positive and not speak the thoughts that run through my head. but as my psychologist once told me. keeping things inside you is why you attempted suicide. she taught me share my thoughts more to stop the overwhelming feeling of being alone in this world
Sorry for lowering the fun others have in the forums. it is never my intent to do so. but seems i do it too much
whist you may be strong enough to handle some name calling,. i am not. I am extremely weak and only when Jesus carries me do i manage to get through my day. many days i do not wish to continue. i come to CC to try and be involved. i try my best to remain positive and not speak the thoughts that run through my head. but as my psychologist once told me. keeping things inside you is why you attempted suicide. she taught me share my thoughts more to stop the overwhelming feeling of being alone in this world
Sorry for lowering the fun others have in the forums. it is never my intent to do so. but seems i do it too much
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I’m married, but I don’t think I’ve ever gone to a specific forum, except when I make a rare thread.
I just hit the “new post” tab, and scroll down, and if the title is something I’d like to check out, I’ll click on it and maybe comment.
The singles peeps often have interesting topics.
I just hit the “new post” tab, and scroll down, and if the title is something I’d like to check out, I’ll click on it and maybe comment.
The singles peeps often have interesting topics.
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Just be yourself.
Many years ago, I struggled with being myself, and, without even realizing it until God showed it to me in more ways than one, that actually lead to me hating myself.
One of the many ways that God got me to break free was through a word of knowledge that came forth in a church service one night.
I'm paraphrasing, but the word basically said that there was someone there who was like a bottle of strong cologne, and that they were afraid to take the cap off of it because of fear of what others might think of the strong aroma. In other words, due to this fear, who they really were was all "bottled up" inside.
I knew that that was me, and, in case nobody has noticed, I blew that stinkin' cap to smithereens years ago.
Do I have a "strong" personality?
Yes, I most certainly do, BUT it's never my intent to use my "strength" to harm anybody.
Anyhow, for whatever it's worth, I like you.
I still think that little poem that you wrote on one of these threads was the best poem I've ever read...lol.
To cinder's point, get acquainted with the "ignore" button if need be.
I recently put three people here on "ignore", and my life is much more peaceful now.
Some people, sad to say, are just a hopeless waste of time and energy.
Many years ago, I struggled with being myself, and, without even realizing it until God showed it to me in more ways than one, that actually lead to me hating myself.
One of the many ways that God got me to break free was through a word of knowledge that came forth in a church service one night.
I'm paraphrasing, but the word basically said that there was someone there who was like a bottle of strong cologne, and that they were afraid to take the cap off of it because of fear of what others might think of the strong aroma. In other words, due to this fear, who they really were was all "bottled up" inside.
I knew that that was me, and, in case nobody has noticed, I blew that stinkin' cap to smithereens years ago.
Do I have a "strong" personality?
Yes, I most certainly do, BUT it's never my intent to use my "strength" to harm anybody.
Anyhow, for whatever it's worth, I like you.
I still think that little poem that you wrote on one of these threads was the best poem I've ever read...lol.
To cinder's point, get acquainted with the "ignore" button if need be.
I recently put three people here on "ignore", and my life is much more peaceful now.
Some people, sad to say, are just a hopeless waste of time and energy.
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people have short attention spans, you just deal with it
they get bored easy
Children have it, but I think its cos they get rushed around so much, that the teachers cant actually get them to sit down and read for any length of time before rushing them on to the next task.
Its is because they are constantly distracted and looking for the NEW thing.
But they have not learned to spend some time, even if it takes them ALL day on one thing.
to say someone has a short attention span is not a 'personal attack" its just an observation. sheesh. If someone writes a long post, its because they may have a lot to say.
You Respect someones voice to say it or you dont and just act rude and tell them to cut it short.
rude rude rude!
they get bored easy
Children have it, but I think its cos they get rushed around so much, that the teachers cant actually get them to sit down and read for any length of time before rushing them on to the next task.
Its is because they are constantly distracted and looking for the NEW thing.
But they have not learned to spend some time, even if it takes them ALL day on one thing.
to say someone has a short attention span is not a 'personal attack" its just an observation. sheesh. If someone writes a long post, its because they may have a lot to say.
You Respect someones voice to say it or you dont and just act rude and tell them to cut it short.
rude rude rude!
* Do married people ever look around here (the Singles Forum,) and think something like, "Oh, those poor clumsy chaps, they're just stumbling around!" But in more of a good-natured, "they're trying their best, but they'll figure it out eventually" kind of way, rather than as judgment or criticism?
I don't think the first part of your statement/question above. What I have asked myself and I'd really like an answer from some of the singles if they wouldn't mind is... When they say they have never been on a date....
I wonder how is that possible. I'm looking back at my life as a younger person and when I was in school had crushes on boys and such. But the school I went to had activities and we did a lot of boy/girl thing in groups like going to the roller skating rink and swimming pool parties I mean they weren't dates per say but still intermixed activities that were supervised.
How is it possible to never have had a date and you are 30, 40 or more? Just curious.
* How do married people feel when singles say they are lonely, and what would you tell them?
I gave myself a challenge one time to meet 7 men and my rules were get their name and have a brief conversation. That was it. Before the 7th guy I had met a fella that asked me out and we had a nice time together for a little while.
Another suggestion would be get involved with an activity that is going on at your church. If they feed the homeless, go visit nursing homes or choir those types of things sign up and get busy as you won't have time to be lonely and you are with other people doing something for the Lord in the process.
* What makes married people want to hang out with us single folk, anyway?
Cause single folks are people too and I like people...lol Who knows you might need some unsolicited advice..lol
MY RESPONCE: In Red.
I don't think the first part of your statement/question above. What I have asked myself and I'd really like an answer from some of the singles if they wouldn't mind is... When they say they have never been on a date....
I wonder how is that possible. I'm looking back at my life as a younger person and when I was in school had crushes on boys and such. But the school I went to had activities and we did a lot of boy/girl thing in groups like going to the roller skating rink and swimming pool parties I mean they weren't dates per say but still intermixed activities that were supervised.
How is it possible to never have had a date and you are 30, 40 or more? Just curious.
* How do married people feel when singles say they are lonely, and what would you tell them?
I gave myself a challenge one time to meet 7 men and my rules were get their name and have a brief conversation. That was it. Before the 7th guy I had met a fella that asked me out and we had a nice time together for a little while.
Another suggestion would be get involved with an activity that is going on at your church. If they feed the homeless, go visit nursing homes or choir those types of things sign up and get busy as you won't have time to be lonely and you are with other people doing something for the Lord in the process.
* What makes married people want to hang out with us single folk, anyway?
Cause single folks are people too and I like people...lol Who knows you might need some unsolicited advice..lol
MY RESPONCE: In Red.
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I can answer that with a quote from a six year old girl.
"Mommy do I HAVE to fall in love?"
"Well... No, I guess not."
"Good. I've got stuff to do."
For me it is just because I never have bothered to go out looking for a girl. My life is going fine right now and I see no reason to mess with it.
I'm a nerd and I follow the nerd principle of "Upgrade ONLY for a reason." If a computer is doing everything I want and working just fine, I refuse to upgrade to the latest system just because it's new. It's fine just the way it is. Why mess up something that works?
My life is just fine like it is. I have no reason to try to improve perfection. And if well meaning but annoying matchmakers try to improve it for me, I have a flamethrower for such problems.
"Mommy do I HAVE to fall in love?"
"Well... No, I guess not."
"Good. I've got stuff to do."
For me it is just because I never have bothered to go out looking for a girl. My life is going fine right now and I see no reason to mess with it.
I'm a nerd and I follow the nerd principle of "Upgrade ONLY for a reason." If a computer is doing everything I want and working just fine, I refuse to upgrade to the latest system just because it's new. It's fine just the way it is. Why mess up something that works?
My life is just fine like it is. I have no reason to try to improve perfection. And if well meaning but annoying matchmakers try to improve it for me, I have a flamethrower for such problems.
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