I've really been struggling the past half year or so, dealing with allot of tough issues that the Lord has brought to light. One thing that I've struggled with my whole life is admitting to any kind of failure or having some kind of problem whether it be, school, my job, my health, anything really.
God has been breaking me of allot of my patterns of thinking. The most recent being, my ability to be seen as a flawed human, someone who has lots of problems. I've read it before in books, been told it hundreds of times, but tonight it made sense to me, it made sense to me in a personal way. It doesn't matter if nobody likes me at all, I'm a child of the King. A King who cares for me, and wants only the very best for me.
The past year has been rough in allot of ways, but it's also been incredibly beautiful. I've never had the chance to open up and actually find out who I am underneath the shell. I found people who accepted me for who i am, and gave me a chance to pour everything out and search myself. What i found underneath shell behind the mask is a soul searching for God, I am Bugs(at least here), a beloved child of God who has issues, lots of issues. I'm not perfect and it's ok to be flawed, to have problems, and to admit said problems. Seems simple enough, but It's taken allot to realize this, to grasp this, to really own this for myself.
-Bugs; flawed but still loved.