Being born again is God's work not ours.
Think about this reality. No one can choose to be born again, God has either done the work or not.
You can only come to faith if God has done the work.
What the apostles are emphasising is though coming to faith seems a human intellectual assent, it
is actually spiritual and real.
Jesus describes it is the living word, with spirit and truth, comes and dwells in our hearts.
Now I never saw before the actual words of Christ could be alive but they are. They bring us
to faith, they define the promises and expressions of love. Think how families and friends express
love to each other. They are words with a real context, but the words convey the intention and
meaning.
Our moods and emotions often do not align with these realities, but we come to see it as real
when our hearts are stirred. It is the words that convey the realities.
And God said "Let there be light."
So being a christian is about righteousness and purity, but to be able to see this clearly we need
personally each to learn what this means in our walk. And Jesus says obedience, humbleness and
following. This is not extreme like the monks or nuns, but daily bringing things to Christ and listening
to the response.
Some ask why is God silent? Because He has answered in the word, He has answered in His people,
He has answered in the work in your heart. If God repeated these thing "supernaturally" you would
rely only on this and not who you are designed to become, a child of God, whose heart is as Gods
heart, one, sharing, giving and receiving, both separate and together.
So often if God comes plainly to us, there will be no choice, only obedience or sin. He does not
desire this, but that we discover His ways and walk in them. He is gracious and very patient.