divorce

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.

noblenut

Junior Member
Nov 29, 2017
265
90
28
#1
why do some people think they can ignore a law to suit themselves, the main one it is done with is divorce, our Lord said those who divorce and remarry commit divorce, but that is exactly what some church goers do, if u do divorce then stay single and devote yourself to the Lord.
 

JaumeJ

Senior Member
Jul 2, 2011
21,228
6,526
113
#2
why do some people think they can ignore a law to suit themselves, the main one it is done with is divorce, our Lord said those who divorce and remarry commit divorce, but that is exactly what some church goers do, if u do divorce then stay single and devote yourself to the Lord.
Sin is exactly what you have said, not listening to our Father and "suiting yourselves."

Not to diminish disobedience to our Father, but we all sin, and divorce is just one of the many. We should not look for a sin or sins tht are tooo awful to be forgiven, for that would be even the smallest point of the law.

Also, it is spiritually unhealthy to even point out thesins of any individuals lest we condemn ourselves. Forgive always and share the Good News.

I cannot nor would I condemn divorcees with the number of divores in my immediate family. I love them, and pray to see them in the Kingdom.... As I do for all who sin, that would be you and I.
 

JaumeJ

Senior Member
Jul 2, 2011
21,228
6,526
113
#3
Sin is exactly what you have said, not listening to our Father and "suiting yourselves."

Not to diminish disobedience to our Father, but we all sin, and divorce is just one of the many. We should not look for a sin or sins tht are tooo awful to be forgiven, for that would be even the smallest point of the law.

Also, it is spiritually unhealthy to even point out thesins of any individuals lest we condemn ourselves. Forgive always and share the Good News.

I cannot nor would I condemn divorcees with the number of divores in my immediate family. I love them, and pray to see them in the Kingdom.... As I do for all who sin, that would be you and I.
correction: "that would be for you and me."
 
R

RodB65

Guest
#4
I want to rant here, but I'll save it for later.
 

noblenut

Junior Member
Nov 29, 2017
265
90
28
#5
Sin is exactly what you have said, not listening to our Father and "suiting yourselves."

Not to diminish disobedience to our Father, but we all sin, and divorce is just one of the many. We should not look for a sin or sins tht are tooo awful to be forgiven, for that would be even the smallest point of the law.

Also, it is spiritually unhealthy to even point out thesins of any individuals lest we condemn ourselves. Forgive always and share the Good News.

I cannot nor would I condemn divorcees with the number of divores in my immediate family. I love them, and pray to see them in the Kingdom.... As I do for all who sin, that would be you and I.
i am sorry to here u got so many in your family, its say God hates divorce, and all have sinned, but when we come to maturity we leave the elementary truths of forgiveness behind and go on to full self control (hebrews)
 

Adstar

Senior Member
Jul 24, 2016
7,425
3,473
113
#6
why do some people think they can ignore a law to suit themselves, the main one it is done with is divorce, our Lord said those who divorce and remarry commit divorce, but that is exactly what some church goers do, if u do divorce then stay single and devote yourself to the Lord.
Jesus said::
(Matthew 19:9) "And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery."

So if a partner cheats on their wife/husband then that is grounds for Divorce and as long as the divorce was for that reason then one can get remarried and they will not be committing adultery..

Why don't people actually read the Bible as believe what it says?
 

JaumeJ

Senior Member
Jul 2, 2011
21,228
6,526
113
#7
Yes, God hates sin; so true.

Breaking any of his laws is sin. Haver you read and understood that if a person has broken the least of the laws he is guilty of having broken all of the law? Yes it is true., so it is good to not hold anyone one person's sin against them to condemnation or we have judged ourselves. Praise God for His understanding, forgivemess, mercy and grace, amen.
 

unclesilas

Active member
Feb 6, 2019
483
170
43
#8
why do some people think they can ignore a law to suit themselves, the main one it is done with is divorce, our Lord said those who divorce and remarry commit divorce, but that is exactly what some church goers do, if u do divorce then stay single and devote yourself to the Lord.
Sounds very good to me. If you do divorce, stay single and devote yourself to the Lord. Are there occasions when divorce is right apart from adultery? What if God specifically showed a person they should not marry someone, He had a different purpose for their life. Can the person disobey God, marry the person and then say ''Though I have disobeyed God He will just have to accept the marriage as you must only divorce for adultery?'' Doesn't sound right to me
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,299
16,294
113
69
Tennessee
#9
Sounds very good to me. If you do divorce, stay single and devote yourself to the Lord. Are there occasions when divorce is right apart from adultery? What if God specifically showed a person they should not marry someone, He had a different purpose for their life. Can the person disobey God, marry the person and then say ''Though I have disobeyed God He will just have to accept the marriage as you must only divorce for adultery?'' Doesn't sound right to me
It says in the bible that what God has joined together let no one put asunder. Regarding the grounds for remarriage after divorce outside of adultery the question remains, was the couple married in the eyes of God in the first place? God understands the human condition quite well and is full of compassion and mercy. God also says that it is not good to be alone. Yes, there are occasions when divorce and remarriage apart from adultery is acceptable. God wants us to have life and to have it more abundantly.
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
24,672
13,364
113
#10
i am sorry to here u got so many in your family, its say God hates divorce, and all have sinned, but when we come to maturity we leave the elementary truths of forgiveness behind and go on to full self control (hebrews)
I don't see "forgiveness" described as an "elementary truth" anywhere in Hebrews, nor do I see "full self control" mentioned at all.

Forgiving others is, in a sense, elementary, but it's also something we don't "move beyond". God certainly hasn't.

Have you been divorced, and are you speaking from painful experience? Or are you just throwing out condemnation and expressing moral outrage? In either case, you might consider talking with someone... or Someone.
 

JaumeJ

Senior Member
Jul 2, 2011
21,228
6,526
113
#11
It is a wonderful lesson on how the Bride and the Groom well be together for all eternity………

Like all sin, only God is perfect, and He has told us we too will beperfect, on His Eternal Day...…….. Wow, praise God right now and forever, amen.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,176
113
#12
why do some people think they can ignore a law to suit themselves, the main one it is done with is divorce, our Lord said those who divorce and remarry commit divorce, but that is exactly what some church goers do, if u do divorce then stay single and devote yourself to the Lord.
You mean commit adultery?

Yea I wondered that too. Although I dont really see a lot of remarried couples in my church only if they were widowed young. But other churches seem to have them and I wonder about the stepmothers and stepdads and stepchildren. Also why are they called 'step'-??
Sometimes its the other party that divorced in order to remarry and the divorcee then had no option but to remarry as well, so it depends on which party was doing the divorcing I suppose and their heart motivation. Of course its obvious that adultery would break up a marriage although Many dont like to talk about it. I do kind of feel for the party that found their spouse was unfaithful when they had been faithful all the time. JEsus seems to say that this causes the other person to commit adultery if one does it first like tit for tat.

Another thing I wondered is why believers consider marrying divorcees. Ok the divorcees may be believers or come to faith but do they think about being stepparents at all? Do they take any repsonisbility like adoption or is it just..thats your child from a previous relationship. I mean theres lots of illegitmate children from fornication who can never really belong thats why so many turn to drugs it seems.
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
24,672
13,364
113
#13
Another thing I wondered is why believers consider marrying divorcees.
Maybe because there aren't any never-married singles around in their age bracket, whom they find attractive. If you think the only qualification is "believer", you're welcome to it. While I don't think there is anything more important, there are other factors that are important.

Ok the divorcees may be believers or come to faith but do they think about being stepparents at all? Do they take any repsonisbility like adoption or is it just..thats your child from a previous relationship.
Not all divorcees have children still at home. Those that do have more complications to work through, that's all.

I mean theres lots of illegitmate children from fornication who can never really belong thats why so many turn to drugs it seems.
Have you done or read any research on this subject? Your statement seems somewhat uninformed. There is a myriad of reasons why people turn to drugs; having a broken or dysfunctional family is only one of them.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,176
113
#14
Maybe because there aren't any never-married singles around in their age bracket, whom they find attractive. If you think the only qualification is "believer", you're welcome to it. While I don't think there is anything more important, there are other factors that are important.


Not all divorcees have children still at home. Those that do have more complications to work through, that's all.


Have you done or read any research on this subject? Your statement seems somewhat uninformed. There is a myriad of reasons why people turn to drugs; having a broken or dysfunctional family is only one of them.
Yep i done my research. Its a factor not to say its the only factor bit definitely one of the big factors. Have you actually worked with children from broken families...done any social work? Its not just reading about them...its talking to them. Have you ever been close to people dealing with grief and loss, theres that too. Have you done any ministry at all? With people who may or may not believe?

Why are you taking my statements as blanket statements when they are obviously not applying to every single situation on earth...but what Jesus says is true so dont go against what Jesus says.

Some people just arent willing to concede that remarriage isnt always the solution to being single. Why not just be friends and have lots of them instead of binding yourself to one person again. Focus on God first.
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
24,672
13,364
113
#15
Yep i done my research. Its a factor not to say its the only factor bit definitely one of the big factors. Have you actually worked with children from broken families...done any social work? Its not just reading about them...its talking to them. Have you ever been close to people dealing with grief and loss, theres that too. Have you done any ministry at all? With people who may or may not believe?
Ah... instead of considering the merit of my question and actually answering it with information, you brush it aside and throw doubt and shade in reply. Methinks you don't like being challenged.

Why are you taking my statements as blanket statements when they are obviously not applying to every single situation on earth
Because you phrase them as blanket statements.

...but what Jesus says is true so dont go against what Jesus says.
Relevance? Why do you consider this important to mention in your reply to me?

Some people just arent willing to concede that remarriage isnt always the solution to being single. Why not just be friends and have lots of them instead of binding yourself to one person again. Focus on God first.
Some people don't fit your category. Why not just avoid generalizations, unsolicited advice, and veiled criticisms.
 
R

RodB65

Guest
#16
I want to rant here, but I'll save it for later.
I was going to have a rant here, but no need to. I think Jaumej, Tourist, and Dino246 have answered this far better than I could.

But to those who obviously have reached a far higher level of perfection than I will ever attain here, I hope you're not behind me in line on the day of judgement. If you are, you might ought to bring something to read, cause I'll be in there a while... Just sayin...

RB

Father,
May we all find Grace and favor in your sight.
May we all be counted worthy to be in your presence.
May our names be written in the Book of Life!
Thanks and Amen...
 

MJ1

Member
Jan 22, 2019
22
12
3
#17
why do some people think they can ignore a law to suit themselves, the main one it is done with is divorce, our Lord said those who divorce and remarry commit divorce, but that is exactly what some church goers do, if u do divorce then stay single and devote yourself to the Lord.
What you are stating is not what Jesus said. He answered and said to them, “Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’ and said, “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let not man separate.” They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?” He said to them, “Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.” His disciples said to Him, “If such is the case of the man with his wife, it is better not to marry.” Matthew 19:4-10

Sexual immorality (fornication) and death (Rom. 7:2-4) provide the only severance to the marriage bond.

Consider Deuteronomy 24:1-4 “When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some uncleanness in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, puts it in her hand, and sends her out of his house, when she has departed from his house, and goes and becomes another man's wife, if the latter husband detests her and writes her a certificate of divorce, puts it in her hand, and sends her out of his house, or if the latter husband dies who took her as his wife, then her former husband who divorced her must not take her back to be his wife after she has been defiled; for that is an abomination before the Lord, and you shall not bring sin on the land which the Lord your God is giving you as an inheritance.

Although we are not under law but grace, we can learn from Deut. 24:1-4 that when the divorce wife has remarried, she likely would have form a bond with her new husband, thus the former husband was never to remarry her. This again shows us that fornication severs the bond.

And in the New Testament Joseph was considered a righteous man yet he was about to divorce his wife Mary when learning that she was with child, until told not to do so by an angel in a dream. (Matt 1:19)

Therefore, divorce due to sexual immorality (fornication) was permitted by God, and was not considered a sin. In fact, God considered giving Israel a certificate of divorce because of her adulterous behaviour, but instead he took her back (Jer. 3:1-8)

So, there are circumstances where divorce individuals can marry again. Other things to consider, would be the relationship that the individuals had with God when they were married. Did God bring join them together or did they join themselves being lead by the flesh and not the Spirit? And should married believers be placing a yoke on new believers who are divorced that they themselves are not willing to wear?

Most importantly, one should consider that the message of Jesus Christ is one of reconciliation and grace.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,299
16,294
113
69
Tennessee
#18
Some people just arent willing to concede that remarriage isnt always the solution to being single. Why not just be friends and have lots of them instead of binding yourself to one person again. Focus on God first.
The thing about having lots of friends instead of remarrying is that the more friends one has the least significant each becomes. Personally, I would rather have just one best friend and that is my wife. I wasn't looking for a solution to being single but was lonely for a lifelong companion and traveling partner. Yes, we all should focus on God but what does that mean in a practical sense? We each still have our lives to live.
 
Sep 3, 2016
6,337
527
113
#19
I don't see "forgiveness" described as an "elementary truth" anywhere in Hebrews, nor do I see "full self control" mentioned at all.

Forgiving others is, in a sense, elementary, but it's also something we don't "move beyond". God certainly hasn't.

Have you been divorced, and are you speaking from painful experience? Or are you just throwing out condemnation and expressing moral outrage? In either case, you might consider talking with someone... or Someone.
The reason why you are divorce is because you do not know how to live for God. Your faith is in Jesus, but not the Finished Work at Calvary's Cross where the victory was won. This is called spiritual adultery; you are serving another Jesus (not the Jesus in the bible). The sin nature was reactivated (the works of the flesh) that allowed Satan to move against your marriage through the "Law of sin and death." You silence the helper, the Holy Spirit so no blessings of grace flowed through the Cross (your cross, where all the benefits of this resurrection life are received).
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
24,672
13,364
113
#20
The reason why you are divorce is because you do not know how to live for God. Your faith is in Jesus, but not the Finished Work at Calvary's Cross where the victory was won. This is called spiritual adultery; you are serving another Jesus (not the Jesus in the bible). The sin nature was reactivated (the works of the flesh) that allowed Satan to move against your marriage through the "Law of sin and death." You silence the helper, the Holy Spirit so no blessings of grace flowed through the Cross (your cross, where all the benefits of this resurrection life are received).
You don't know a thing about my life.

You also don't know a thing about my faith, and your demonstrated inability to understand what I write is loud and clear testimony to that.

Your input on this or any personal subject of mine is not welcome.