Why do men suddenly disappear?

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Oncefallen

Idiot in Chief
Staff member
Jan 15, 2011
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Funny, though, how on Springer's or Povich's shows when these women make these complaints and then videos expose them for the two or three timers that they are. The link I provided does make the point but we can never know with full accuracy as to the actual amounts of such breakups because, as you say, so many people like to point the finger at others rather than themselves.

**is positive that Springer or Povich always insure that their guest lists well represent the norm in American society

/sarcasm off

I would think that a man of your age would know that shows such as Jerry Springer specifically hand pick their guests for maximum shock value. "Normal" and "average" has no shock value whereas a woman who is divorcing her husband for infidelity that has had numerous affairs herself since it is NOT the norm has shock value which brings viewers. Viewers equals ratings, ratings equals show sponsors paying more money.


 
May 25, 2016
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I've never disappeared, so I don't have the answer for this question. I take great pride in fulfilling my commitments and following through on my word. Also if I feel that i shouldn't do something or need to stop doing it, I make sure I handle it in a way that is fair to everyone involved. I was just raised that way.
 

peacenik

Senior Member
May 11, 2016
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**is positive that Springer or Povich always insure that their guest lists well represent the norm in American society

/sarcasm off

I would think that a man of your age would know that shows such as Jerry Springer specifically hand pick their guests for maximum shock value. "Normal" and "average" has no shock value whereas a woman who is divorcing her husband for infidelity that has had numerous affairs herself since it is NOT the norm has shock value which brings viewers. Viewers equals ratings, ratings equals show sponsors paying more money.




I think you are wise enough to know that my link (and there are many others you can readily find) or my reference to either show represents any form of exclusivity or uniqueness in this regard. At least I would hope so. :rolleyes:
 

Born_Again

Senior Member
Nov 15, 2014
1,583
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For me, it only takes a couple things that weird me out..... And, if he leaves when things are going smoothly.. they weren't going smoothly from his perspective. Its all a game of keeping up appearances.
 
May 25, 2016
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For me, it only takes a couple things that weird me out..... And, if he leaves when things are going smoothly.. they weren't going smoothly from his perspective. Its all a game of keeping up appearances.
The part in bold is EXACTLY why I despise the dating scene so much. The whole "game" just doesn't compute for me, no matter how much I try to make sense of it. Why do people have trouble being upfront and honest about how they feel towards other people?!?!!!!
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,560
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Tennessee
My rule on dating is to never date someone that you would not consider marrying. I believe that people are not always forthright due to fear of rejection or perhaps they are ashamed about something. Honesty is a good foundation block for developing a relationship.
 
M

MadParrotWoman

Guest
What puzzles me is, after all these years in which it has been repeatedly proven that women are the chief causes of breakups (both marital and unmarried romantic ones) why is it still believed by so many that men are the ones who disappear the most and cause these breakups?



I don't normally watch programming on tv other than sports, news, old movies, and cooking shows. But you cannot help briefly seeing every once in a while Jerry Springer or Maury Povich highlights of shows with titles such as "I'm breaking up with my boyfriend or husband because he cheats". Then after a while the show reveals that she cheated a dozen more times than he ever did. Shows such as these have been shown dozens of times.
Erm you actually believe these shows are real situations??? Hmmm

In my experience it's generally men who cheat and women who leave but maybe that's just me.
 
May 25, 2016
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Erm you actually believe these shows are real situations??? Hmmm

In my experience it's generally men who cheat and women who leave but maybe that's just me.
The notion that mean are the cheaters is so outdated. It's an equal playing field out there with the young generation, trust me.
 
May 26, 2016
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The notion that mean are the cheaters is so outdated. It's an equal playing field out there with the young generation, trust me.
Yes, all the guys I spoke to were cheated on. They were not young.
 
R

Rosesrock

Guest
In my married life I've experenced more women leaving then men. But I think it's just sin in general. It's too easy to leave and not fight through a relationship. Some things are of course justifed. But gender isnt at fault
 
May 25, 2016
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In my married life I've experenced more women leaving then men. But I think it's just sin in general. It's too easy to leave and not fight through a relationship. Some things are of course justifed. But gender isnt at fault
I agree with you, I look forward to ALL the ups and downs that are a part of marriage. I was raised by a single mom all my life and I made a promise to myself to fight for my marriage and family through hell or high water. The only thing I know for a fact that I could never work through is infidelity. Cheating would be break a certain level of trust that I know I could never give back to a person.
 
R

Rosesrock

Guest
I agree with you, I look forward to ALL the ups and downs that are a part of marriage. I was raised by a single mom all my life and I made a promise to myself to fight for my marriage and family through hell or high water. The only thing I know for a fact that I could never work through is infidelity. Cheating would be break a certain level of trust that I know I could never give back to a person.
I understand but sad because Christ forgave uus totally not 99.9% he didn't put any condition on salvation. Believe in me and have semi everlasting life. It's funny how we all have our conditions with people but we don't want to live like Christ.
Oh you say rose...... Pfftt. But it hasn't happened to you. Your story sounds so perfect. Um no.....
I've been asked to write a book but I'm sure if I could get through it. I've been there. The pain and uncertainty of a sin commited against a spouse is more than anyone can bear.
My commitment is to my Lord. Not to my husband. We have to stop thinking so selfishly and what can I get out of a relationship.
It ain't about us. It's about unconditional love the extends passed the hurt.
 
J

jeremyPJ

Guest
I understand that Christ forgives most all sins, but most of us can't be totally like him, this is why he saves us if we ask him.

The one justified reason by the Lord for us to dismiss a spouse is because of cheating. I have forgiven two wives for it one time a piece and gave them second chances (at the disdain of my parents!) but ithappened again.

The one I had a child with, well it just got worse. Unconditional love only travels so far. I will not tolerate cheating anymore. One and Done. There's just no reasonable excuse for it.
 
J

jeremyPJ

Guest
If things can't be dealt with inside a marriage, how in the world does anyone expect to make things any better outside the marriage?
 
R

Rosesrock

Guest
I understand that Christ forgives most all sins, but most of us can't be totally like him, this is why he saves us if we ask him.

The one justified reason by the Lord for us to dismiss a spouse is because of cheating. I have forgiven two wives for it one time a piece and gave them second chances (at the disdain of my parents!) but ithappened again.

The one I had a child with, well it just got worse. Unconditional love only travels so far. I will not tolerate cheating anymore. One and Done. There's just no reasonable excuse for it.
That's what I said. Some is justifed but not the best. I was referring to how easy people make it. Which I should have added. No one needs to defend their decision to me.
If you read a few threads about people posting their stuff, 9 times out of ten you will see suggestions of divorce over any other reconciliation option. It's sad.
Oh and sorry for your experiences. Not easy.
 

peacenik

Senior Member
May 11, 2016
3,071
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I was on the city bus returning home from a girls softball tournament this afternoon when something happened that would have fit quite neatly in a Povich or Springer show:


A man and woman board the bus with the mother carrying a little boy of about 1 year of age. She puts him very harshly on the seat and he starts crying. The man asks, 'why did you do that to the baby?' Then she walks away and sits away from both. The man follows her and again asks why she did that to the child and also asks, "why do you have to cause a scene in public, why is it that I just cannot communicate with you?" A woman with a four or five year old girl sees this and quickly moves to a different part of the bus. All throughout the ride the man continually tries to speak with the woman and all she does is say nothing despite the baby's tears. The man finally settles down the child but the woman shows no remorse for what she did.

They finally get off the bus in down town and you can still see that the woman wants no part of the man or of her own child.

It sure as heck wasn't a pleasant scene. Hate to speculate as to what will happen next. But if someone clearly has no interest in her husband or her own baby, it's a good bet she, like other women, will abandon both. Let's hope she will repent of her misconduct and do the right thing next time ...
 
T

Tintin

Guest
For me, it only takes a couple things that weird me out..... And, if he leaves when things are going smoothly.. they weren't going smoothly from his perspective. Its all a game of keeping up appearances.
Keeping up appearances is a terrible idea. Unless we're talking about the British TV series.

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seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
15,539
4,782
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It sure as heck wasn't a pleasant scene. Hate to speculate as to what will happen next. But if someone clearly has no interest in her husband or her own baby, it's a good bet she, like other women, will abandon both. Let's hope she will repent of her misconduct and do the right thing next time ...
I don't know who my mother was. And I don't know if it was her or someone else that left me in a cardboard box in a public place to be found by strangers.

But I do know that despite that, I've come to accept what was done, and I don't hate her or other women nearly as much as you do.

May God heal your heart of whatever you've been through that makes you speak about women so spitefully in nearly every post you make.
 

peacenik

Senior Member
May 11, 2016
3,071
26
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I don't know who my mother was. And I don't know if it was her or someone else that left me in a cardboard box in a public place to be found by strangers.

But I do know that despite that, I've come to accept what was done, and I don't hate her or other women nearly as much as you do.

May God heal your heart of whatever you've been through that makes you speak about women so spitefully in nearly every post you make.



Hate? I wonder if I should report such a harsh post. After all it is most unchristian. But in case you didn't know it, I coached women's and girl's sports since before you were born and spent thousands of hours doing so for free. Several were awarded scholarships and attributed their success in sports and later on in life to my teachings. I could go on about this but it is not worth the effort.
 
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seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
15,539
4,782
113
Hate? I wonder if I should report such a harsh post. After all it is most unchristian. But in case you didn't know it, I coached women's and girl's sports since before you were born and spent thousands of hours doing so for free. Several were awarded scholarships and attributed their success in sports and later on in life to my teachings. I could go on about this but it is not worth the effort.
Likewise.

God Bless.

Feel free to report my post if you wish.

I've been here for quite some time, so most of the mods here already know me, and they'll definitely know who you're talking about in your complaint.

Best wishes.