How Much Is Appropriate to Spend On an Engagement Ring?

[cmarieh]

Now, I feel just awful stating what I posted earlier. I am just a practical thinker when it comes to finances, I suppose that could be partly why I am in accounting. As a result of thinking and planning ahead a lot of the time causes me to put my foot in my mouth. I do like the idea of wearing an heirloom because it means that his family thinks you are good enough for him to wear is grandmothers engagement ring. As I looked at the options I now realize that was one of the options. Oops, sorry you guys

 

[secularhermit]

Are you talkig about this rings?

 

[seoulsearch]

^^^

Sure, that ring looks appropriate... If the guy plans on branding her like a piece of cattle...

Cmarieh, no need to apologize. I was engaged to my high school boyfriend a long time ago and back then, I used to like looking at all the $3000 sparklers too, so my idea of what's "practical" or "necessary" has changed a bit over the years.

And for some people, a magnificent ring might be a family tradition. Ring or no ring... The whole point of this thread was just to talk about what people like or dislike and how they felt about the cost of it... No worries!

 

[Shannon50]

I just thought of something---- maybe the engagement ring is part of our culture's "cinderella" story-- we can't be a princess, but for a day on our wedding we can feel like one in our Beautiful dress, when everyone stands up as we walk down the isle-- maybe an engagement ring is part of that story...our crown jewels so to speak... SO maybe a diamond tiara would be the equivalent if we could wear it everyday---

 

[Oncefallen]

I think if someone had like an old family ring that was precious to them and they wanted to use that I think that would be really sweet. Otherwise I would love like a pearl engagement ring, and those are like barely $200

Decades back this was more common than diamonds, my mother's engagement ring was a pearl and I found out after getting engaged to my wife that she would have passed it on had she known in advance.

Who pays for the rings? Is the man expected to pay for both his and her rings? Do they split the cost?

I'm a traditionalist when it comes to this, he buys hers, she buys his.

What do you consider to be modern etiquette in deciding who pays, especially if the rings are going to cost several thousand dollars? Is going to the bank for a loan appropriate?

NO, NO, NO!!!!! Call me a cheapskate if you want, but going into debt to buy a ring is asinine. Wedding and engagement jewelery is ridiculously marked up already (most jewelery real worth is about 25% of retail) so gong into debt and artificially increasing that markup with interest is foolhardy IMO. Buy what you can afford, not based on the rule of thumb of three months salary which was probably the best marketing ploy ever put in place by diamond wholesalers.

*waits patiently for Angie to post her answer before responding*

*twiddles thumbs*

CHICKEN!!!!!!!

 

[Shannon50]

Are you talkig about this rings?

^^^

Sure, that ring looks appropriate... If the guy plans on branding her like a piece of cattle...

Cmarieh, no need to apologize. I was engaged to my high school boyfriend a long time ago and back then, I used to like looking at all the $3000 sparklers too, so my idea of what's "practical" or "necessary" has changed a bit over the years.

And for some people, a magnificent ring might be a family tradition. Ring or no ring... The whole point of this thread was just to talk about what people like or dislike and how they felt about the cost of it... No worries!

Is that really to brand cattle with?

 

[Grace-Like-Rain]

I'm terrified to post in this thread now. Thanks guys.

 

[kenthomas27]

*waits patiently for Angie to post her answer before responding*

*twiddles thumbs*

Now, lookahere boy, you can't go into this thing half baked! You got to woo, I say woo her is what. Why you'd ride Leviathan hisself to the pristine waters of the Persian Gulf and come near a drownin' in search for perfeck iridescent Goliath pearl for that maiden's hand! You'd put Superman hisself in a sleeper hold until he squeezed a chunk of coal into the perfect diamond so big she'd have to take it off afore she took a bath to keep from drownin' herself! Get with the program son! Woo, I say woo her boy!

 

[ServantStrike]

Now, I feel just awful stating what I posted earlier. I am just a practical thinker when it comes to finances, I suppose that could be partly why I am in accounting. As a result of thinking and planning ahead a lot of the time causes me to put my foot in my mouth. I do like the idea of wearing an heirloom because it means that his family thinks you are good enough for him to wear is grandmothers engagement ring. As I looked at the options I now realize that was one of the options. Oops, sorry you guys

You worry too much.

Honestly if a guy can't handle his hypothetical engagement ring scenario being shot down he has no business getting engaged.
That's the deal with love. You get stepped on chewed out and eventually you win it die trying.

 

[cmarieh]

You worry too much.

Honestly if a guy can't handle his hypothetical engagement ring scenario being shot down he has no business getting engaged.
That's the deal with love. You get stepped on chewed out and eventually you win it die trying.

One of the worst qualities that I have, I suppose. It is something I am currently trying to improve. But, yes I do agree with you

 

[singmeasongofgrace]

It's sort of lame to me to speak of exes, lol. My engagement ring was gorgeous though! He had it customized the way I had described how I wanted it to be when we were on our first date years ago. He never once told me a price. He spent months on it, had a diamond in the middle and my birthstone and his birthstone and inner ring engraved the dates we held dear, to our hearts. We spent almost $1500 each on our wedding bands, but shortly sold those due to our parting.


For me that was better than knowing a price, but the time and love he had put into designing it.

 

[secularhermit]

Investing that time, in the design but, you meant parting (as divorce or separation?)

Like I said...

 

[ArtsieSteph]

I found this on etsy, barely $300 ;D

 

[singmeasongofgrace]

Yeah we weren't prepared and now have went different ways. Called engagement off
...

 

[ServantStrike]

It's sort of lame to me to speak of exes, lol. My engagement ring was gorgeous though! He had it customized the way I had described how I wanted it to be when we were on our first date years ago. He never once told me a price. He spent months on it, had a diamond in the middle and my birthstone and his birthstone and inner ring engraved the dates we held dear, to our hearts. We spent almost $1500 each on our wedding bands, but shortly sold those due to our parting.


For me that was better than knowing a price, but the time and love he had put into designing it.

This is not an encouraging story...

Without context, it's impossible to say exactly what happened here. For the record though, I think a guy spending a ton of money on his band is a bit foolish though.



I guess I'd need to find a machine shop, because Monel isn't something a jeweler could work with.

 

[MissCris]

This is relevant...I've been waiting years for this to be relevant.
[video=youtube_share;kv51KjNryGM]http://youtu.be/kv51KjNryGM[/video]

 

[maxwel]

I like pretty things.

One time I buy a girl an expensive ring.
(Much more expensive than the prices in this poll.)

The girl and I break up.

We've had the ring slightly too long to return it.

So now I'm sitting in my office with a VERY expensive paper weight on my desk.

I'm just staring at it.

Finally I think to myself,
"Golly, it's sure good that I like pretty things."

 

[cmarieh]

I like pretty things.

One time I buy a girl an expensive ring.
(Much more expensive than the prices in this poll.)

The girl and I break up.

We've had the ring slightly too long to return it.

So now I'm sitting in my office with a VERY expensive paper weight on my desk.

I'm just staring at it.

Finally I think to myself,
"Golly, it's sure good that I like pretty things."

So, I guess you can say you have been in the "ringer" once or twice. Just kidding, Maxwel Lol

 

[Shouryu]

I just thought of something---- maybe the engagement ring is part of our culture's "cinderella" story-- we can't be a princess, but for a day on our wedding we can feel like one in our Beautiful dress, when everyone stands up as we walk down the isle--

Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnope, that's not what the engagement ring was intended for.

The original point of the engagement ring was virginity insurance, and nothing to do with being treated like a princess. (The having a day to be treated like a princess is a relatively recent development, fostered into hyperdrive by this generation's current streak of narcissism.)

This is actually the original point of the engagement ring:

--"We've been courting for what seems like ages! When can we have sex?"
--"When you marry me, of course."
--"Ummm...If I promise to marry you, can we finally have sex?"
--"No. How will I know you won't just take my virginity and toss me aside?"
--"Uhhhh...why don't I give you an outrageously expensive token to wear? It will symbolize our betrothment, and if I don't follow through and marry you, you get to keep it as payment for your virginity."
--"Deal."

I wish I was joking. I am not.

Still make you feel like a princess for a day now that you know how the tradition started? ^_^

 

[AsifinPassing]

What, on our budget, we can honestly afford (save up for), and not feel convicted for when praying together about feeding the hungry.