Why are people on this site so rude?

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Oncefallen

Idiot in Chief
Staff member
Jan 15, 2011
6,061
3,400
113
#82
So, I'm the President of a recently started charity to help homeless and addicted people and I was asking members here what they thought about my charity. Since I'm appealing to a wide range of Christian denominations, I thought this would be a good place for people to share their insight into my charity.

They obviously deleted it. Any idea why they would do that?

You'll have to ask them directly. If I was to try and second guess any decision admins have made, I may well get it wrong.

However, if I was responsible for any decision making, I would probably have rejected your post. There's no way I could prove the integrity of your institution, and there are some very cunning scammers and conmen/women on the internet. I wouldn't have set this site up to be used as a means for any member to garner support or donations to their cause, so I would have to guard against that happening be it intentional or by default. I would probably offer you feedback on what I personally thought, and maybe passed on the thinking of my collegiate admins too, about your project and as to whether or not we feel it would be a good thing for you to progress along. It's probably better to ask your own church fellowship for an opinion if you have access to that, since they will know of you and your integrity, and provide support.

Ultimately, ChristianTonyB pretty much nailed it. Christian Chat has always prohibited using it's platform to advertise/promote ANY website, charity, YouTube channel, Facebook page, Twitter feed, fundraising event, etc. for several reasons.

First, (and foremost) there is absolutely no way for us as a site to confirm the legitimacy of your organization (yes, people really would come onto a Christian website and lie).

Secondly, our members come here for the sense of community and discussion, not to be hit up for donations on every other page (which would be what happens without our prohibition on solicitation).
 

JTB

Well-known member
Aug 31, 2021
2,210
690
113
#83
No. Why should your desire limit the ability of others?

Any ways, it will never happen...
One of the reasons I ignore people is because their responses to my words show they do not read to understand, but to respond in ignorance of those words. And not understanding, their response is not pertinent to what was said, and is often just brash, insulting, and unnecessary. Why should someone who is not going to make an effort to understand my words, be privy to them?

That said, you are right, the chances of this being instituted are as great as the chances of satan throwing snowballs.
 

bluewriter

Junior Member
Mar 14, 2016
103
36
28
#84
Ultimately, ChristianTonyB pretty much nailed it. Christian Chat has always prohibited using it's platform to advertise/promote ANY website, charity, YouTube channel, Facebook page, Twitter feed, fundraising event, etc. for several reasons.

First, (and foremost) there is absolutely no way for us as a site to confirm the legitimacy of your organization (yes, people really would come onto a Christian website and lie).

Secondly, our members come here for the sense of community and discussion, not to be hit up for donations on every other page (which would be what happens without our prohibition on solicitation).

I only referenced my site so people could give me feedback about it. There absolutely IS a way to confirm the legitimacy of my charity since my information is on the website and is registered with the State of Illinois (searchable on Illinois Cyber Drive with the Secretary of State's Office.) It is a not-for-profit corporation. I have to operate as an NFP corporation due to state and federal laws governing charities.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#85
I only referenced my site so people could give me feedback about it. There absolutely IS a way to confirm the legitimacy of my charity since my information is on the website and is registered with the State of Illinois (searchable on Illinois Cyber Drive with the Secretary of State's Office.) It is a not-for-profit corporation. I have to operate as an NFP corporation due to state and federal laws governing charities.
but this is an international site, not just one for the US
I dont think its right to solicit for donations. You can talk about homelessness in general but seems a bit suss when someone says they are a president of a charity because many people are well aware lots of scammers out there from all over the world asking for money (some notoriously from Nigeria?! ) with fronts like that.

I mean I work with children, many who are impoverished and their parents might have addiction and homlessness issues but I wouldnt go round asking people here to give ME money for them..most churches already do something for their vulnerable communities eg community meals, foodbank, counselling, referral to shelters, support workers, drop in centres, clothing drives etc.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#86
One of the reasons I ignore people is because their responses to my words show they do not read to understand, but to respond in ignorance of those words. And not understanding, their response is not pertinent to what was said, and is often just brash, insulting, and unnecessary. Why should someone who is not going to make an effort to understand my words, be privy to them?

That said, you are right, the chances of this being instituted are as great as the chances of satan throwing snowballs.
I think is more to protect YOU than the person whos misunderstanding and doing the insulting, so YOUR light can shine forth to everyone else even that person who is being rude can read what you write, but you cant see theirs cos why should you need to put up with their inane, harsh comments on everything you write.

That person doing the misunderstanding might actually give up their tirade against you and others when theres no kickback to them. It helps so threads dont get derailed which happens a lot when someone just doesnt like what someone else posts and tries to change the topic.
 

bluewriter

Junior Member
Mar 14, 2016
103
36
28
#87
but this is an international site, not just one for the US
I dont think its right to solicit for donations. You can talk about homelessness in general but seems a bit suss when someone says they are a president of a charity because many people are well aware lots of scammers out there from all over the world asking for money (some notoriously from Nigeria?! ) with fronts like that.

I mean I work with children, many who are impoverished and their parents might have addiction and homlessness issues but I wouldnt go round asking people here to give ME money for them..most churches already do something for their vulnerable communities eg community meals, foodbank, counselling, referral to shelters, support workers, drop in centres, clothing drives etc.
I didn't ask for donations. I just wanted feedback about my website and my cause.

And why is it wrong to solicit for donations to a worthy cause? I worked as a youth care worker for six years and as a mental health practitioner for 2.5 years. I've seen and experienced all the sorrows of poverty and the government and church supply endless band-aids so the rich get richer and the poor get poorer and dependent. I have a solution to that endless cycle that would build a PERMANENT homeless shelter for my region.

210 churches in three counties around me. $35,000 annual salary for a pastor in Illinois. That equals $7,350,000 in wages to lead pastors alone (not including janitors, secretaries, youth ministers, worship leaders, etc). Less than a tithe from one year's salaries from just our local pastors would PERMANENTLY solve homelessness in our area. I think it's a righteous, godly cause worth fighting for in 21st century America. Proverbs 19:17 - "He who is generous to the poor lends to the Lord. And the Lord will repay him."
 

JTB

Well-known member
Aug 31, 2021
2,210
690
113
#88
I didn't ask for donations. I just wanted feedback about my website and my cause.

And why is it wrong to solicit for donations to a worthy cause? I worked as a youth care worker for six years and as a mental health practitioner for 2.5 years. I've seen and experienced all the sorrows of poverty and the government and church supply endless band-aids so the rich get richer and the poor get poorer and dependent. I have a solution to that endless cycle that would build a PERMANENT homeless shelter for my region.

210 churches in three counties around me. $35,000 annual salary for a pastor in Illinois. That equals $7,350,000 in wages to lead pastors alone (not including janitors, secretaries, youth ministers, worship leaders, etc). Less than a tithe from one year's salaries from just our local pastors would PERMANENTLY solve homelessness in our area. I think it's a righteous, godly cause worth fighting for in 21st century America. Proverbs 19:17 - "He who is generous to the poor lends to the Lord. And the Lord will repay him."
Jesus is quoted in Matthew and John as saying "The poor you will always have with you, ". So to think you're going to PERMANENTLY solve the problem seems a bit brash. But blessings for the work you do.
 

bluewriter

Junior Member
Mar 14, 2016
103
36
28
#89
Jesus is quoted in Matthew and John as saying "The poor you will always have with you, ". So to think you're going to PERMANENTLY solve the problem seems a bit brash. But blessings for the work you do.
I can't permanently solve poverty, but I can solve homelessness.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,109
9,208
113
#90
I didn't ask for donations. I just wanted feedback about my website and my cause.

And why is it wrong to solicit for donations to a worthy cause? I worked as a youth care worker for six years and as a mental health practitioner for 2.5 years. I've seen and experienced all the sorrows of poverty and the government and church supply endless band-aids so the rich get richer and the poor get poorer and dependent. I have a solution to that endless cycle that would build a PERMANENT homeless shelter for my region.

210 churches in three counties around me. $35,000 annual salary for a pastor in Illinois. That equals $7,350,000 in wages to lead pastors alone (not including janitors, secretaries, youth ministers, worship leaders, etc). Less than a tithe from one year's salaries from just our local pastors would PERMANENTLY solve homelessness in our area. I think it's a righteous, godly cause worth fighting for in 21st century America. Proverbs 19:17 - "He who is generous to the poor lends to the Lord. And the Lord will repay him."
So... you would visit a different church, leave flyers on all the tables in their fellowship hall, and when they object you would argue with them that you should be allowed to clutter up their tables?

That's basically what you're arguing here. This forum is RoboOp's property and he puts it here for us to hang out and chat. He doesn't want advertising so we don't post advertising here. His property, his right.

OnceFallen is a moderator here, and he has already explained the official position to you. You are of course free to argue with the town sheriff, but I've never seen it turn out well. :whistle:
 

p_rehbein

Senior Member
Sep 4, 2013
30,643
6,836
113
#91
I can't permanently solve poverty, but I can solve homelessness.


Are you seriously saying you have the answer to solve homelessness? There are hundreds of millions of homeless persons in the world......

Not for nothing, but I just can't accept that you can...........
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#92
maybe just make another thread about it
it would be interesting what solutions you have but you dont have to put your website or any links to it.

building more homes can alleviate homelessness sure but how do you go about it without them turning into slums as cheaper housing is not going to last very long. Plus people dont want to live in huge housing projects that didnt work either. Amd where do you get the land to buld them on. Or do rich people just donate their holiday homes or something.

I dont know how some people can have 3 or more homes/houses and others cant even own one.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#93
I always thought shopping malls could be turned into schools and schools could be converted to housing since they already have a lot of living facilities. Dont really need the shopping malls.
 

bluewriter

Junior Member
Mar 14, 2016
103
36
28
#94
So... you would visit a different church, leave flyers on all the tables in their fellowship hall, and when they object you would argue with them that you should be allowed to clutter up their tables?

That's basically what you're arguing here. This forum is RoboOp's property and he puts it here for us to hang out and chat. He doesn't want advertising so we don't post advertising here. His property, his right.

OnceFallen is a moderator here, and he has already explained the official position to you. You are of course free to argue with the town sheriff, but I've never seen it turn out well. :whistle:
I didn't ask for donations or advertising. I was looking for opinions. You're obviously full of them, maybe you'd like to check it out yourself and give me your opinion: 22mana.com
 

Socreta93

Senior Member
Jul 28, 2015
2,288
346
83
#95
I won't name names and will just speak from a general sense. It comes down to pride, you see this all the time on social media Christian comment sections. There's less community and fellowship and more "I'm right you're wrong" and trying to gatekeep someone's faith.
 

Rhomphaeam

Active member
Dec 14, 2021
832
218
43
England
www.nblc.church
#96
I didn't ask for donations or advertising. I was looking for opinions. You're obviously full of them, maybe you'd like to check it out yourself and give me your opinion: 22mana.com
I looked and the vision is of course commendable.

The video presentation is in a good diction and auditory phonology - the spacing between your spoken breath pauses is at times, time lapsed, and I assume that is because you were reading from a screen prompt that didn't load in the appropriate spoken clausal phrases. You did mange to cover it on several occasions by spoken emphasis on the connecting words - but you may want to rewrite the prompt load (screen read) to remove that small production fault.

You present well and your body and facial physiognomy is almost perfect.

Hope that helps.
 

posthuman

Senior Member
Jul 31, 2013
37,693
13,514
113
#97
PS, for those of you sending me hateful stuff, I'm just gonna put you on ignore so you can type into the wind. I don't have time for your mess, nor the inclination to deal with it.

this is part of the problem, IMO.
we should be sorting out our issues with each other instead of ignoring them, and each other.

but sorting out the issues we have with each other is hard -- particularly in the BDF where matters of doctrine & theology are typically discussed. the issues we have with each other aren't really with each other but with doctrines and theology, but we transfer those to the people who are repeating the teachings we take issue with. and we get very passionate about those things - and people who aren't really used to people speaking passionately about those things get personally insulted when their ideas are criticized, and when we criticize ideas we likewise tend to criticize the people at the same time.

it's maybe even harder in the news & conspiracy forum, which have become hotbeds of secular political propaganda over the last several years. these are incredibly divisive & immediately dismissive & spiteful towards any outside-of-clique view. i can't even figure out how to talk to anyone there at all; it's such a us-vs.-them attitude and anyone not sold out to "us" is automatically "them"

and the underlying issue with those subforms is equally twofold:

  1. turning arguments about ideas into arguments about people
  2. not listening to each other, immediately dismissing others if they don't align with your view

so like i said -- @KrisWampler -- filling up your ignore list instead of genuinely making effort to reconcile with your brothers and sisters is part of the problem.
no one goes on my ignore list. it's empty.
i've only **very rarely** put people on ignore for a half a week or a week, because they were too aggressively trying to re-engage me in previously discussed topics while i was trying to move on talking with someone else. it was too much of a headache trying to keep up with and/or scroll past spammed replies that had already been dealt with -- and even then i un-ignored them not long after when i had time to go back and hear what they were saying.

it's long been my opinion that 'ignoring' someone you're having a hard time figuring out how to deal with is a cop out.

that button has a purpose, but it's abused. feel free to disagree - do what you think is best with that function; that's just how i see it & i know already i am weird. i was weird before i came here :)
 
T

TheIndianGirl

Guest
#98
It is not just this site. I also have some Christian friends who can be rude at times, so it may be a common trait. Sometimes people get really self-righteous (even on "less important" issues for example about pets) and believe if they don't take a hard stand then they are not standing up for Jesus. I think when someone says something to the effect of "You are wrong" then it is rude, rather than "I disagree".
 

posthuman

Senior Member
Jul 31, 2013
37,693
13,514
113
#99
*shrug

This forum is private property, owned and operated by RoboOp. It's his right to decide what is and is not allowed.

If he decided he didn't want the color orange discussed here, well... it's his forum.
i like orange.
 

posthuman

Senior Member
Jul 31, 2013
37,693
13,514
113
It is not just this site. I also have some Christian friends who can be rude at times, so it may be a common trait. Sometimes people get really self-righteous (even on "less important" issues for example about pets) and believe if they don't take a hard stand then they are not standing up for Jesus. I think when someone says something to the effect of "You are wrong" then it is rude.
for me i try to be gentle and kind with everyone -- not that i'm good at it lol, but i do try
but when people arrive out of nowhere & treat me like they are my teacher and i don't know anything, i hold them to greater scrutiny.
that weirdly happens a lot in places like the BDF. and i get where they are coming from; i used to be like that - and i still can be.


what i really should be doing is turning the other cheek -- so to speak. to overlook accusations, insults or rudeness and just continue in the truth. at the end of the day it's God, not me, that will change their minds, if they will be changed - and God is Truth, and is full of patience and mercy
that's hard. it's contrary to our human natures to be meek. the flesh wants to strike back when it's struck. we need a "
Helper"


to be like Him

may God grant us all grace